Laurence J. Peter

It is wise to remember that you are one of those who can be fooled some of the time.

There is no stigma attached to recognizing a bad decision in time to install a better one.

Competence, like truth, beauty and contact lenses, is in the eye of the beholder.

Everyone rises to their level of incompetence.

If you don't know where you are going, you will probably end up somewhere else.

Psychiatry enables us to correct our faults by confessing our parents' shortcomings.

Bureaucracy defends the status quo long past the time when the quo has lost its status.

Equal opportunity means everyone will have a fair chance at being incompetent.

Democracy is a process by which the people are free to choose the man who will get the blame.

Real, constructive mental power lies in the creative thought that shapes your destiny, and your hour-by-hour mental conduct produces power for change in your life. Develop a train of thought on which to ride. The nobility of your life as well as your happiness depends upon the direction in which that train of thought is going.

A bore is a fellow talking who can change the subject back to his topic of conversation faster than you can change it back to yours.

Cleaning anything involves making something else dirty, but anything can get dirty without something else getting clean.

An economist is an expert who will know tommorrow why the things he predicted yesterday didn't happen today.

In spite of the cost of living, it's still popular.

Speak when you are angry--and you will make the best speech you'll ever regret.

The incompetent with nothing to do can still make a mess of it.

Oh, what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to believe.

Against logic there is no armor like ignorance.

Every man serves a useful purpose: A miser, for example, makes a wonderful ancestor.

A pessimist is a man who looks both ways before crossing a one way street.

Humility is the embarrassment you feel when you tell people how wonderful you are.

America is a country that doesn't know where it is going but is determined to set a speed record getting there.

An economist is an expert who will know tomorrow why the things he predicted yesterday didn't happen today.

Education is a method whereby one acquires a higher grade of prejudices.

If a cluttered desk is the sign of a cluttered mind, what is the significance of a clean desk?

Originality is the fine art of remembering what you hear but forgetting where you heard it.

The man who says he is willing to meet you halfway is usually a poor judge of distance.

An intelligence test sometimes shows a man how smart he would have been not to have taken it.