Quote by Rodney Dangerfield (1921-2004)

• I feel sorry for short people, you know. When it rains, they're the last to know.

• My mother had morning sickness after I was born.

• I'm at an age where I think more about food than sex. Last week I put a mirror over my dining room table.

• Life is just a bowl of pits.

• I just finished my first book. Pretty soon, I'm gonna read another.

• Last time I tried to make love to my wife nothing happened, so I said to her, 'What's the matter, you can't think of anybody either?'