The face of a child can say it all, especially the mouth part of the face. — Jack Handey. American humorist and writer (born 1949) Jack Handey
Whenever you read a good book, it's like the author is right there, in the room, talking to you, which is why I don't like to read good books.
I believe in making the world safe for our children, but not our children's children, because I don't think children should be having sex.
Playing dead not only comes in handy when face to face with a bear, but also at important business meetings.
It makes me mad when people say I turned and ran like a scared rabbit. Maybe it was like an angry rabbit, who was going to fight in another fight, away from the first fight.
To me, it's always a good idea to always carry two sacks of something when you walk around. That way, if anybody says, 'Hey, can you give me a hand?,' you can say, 'Sorry, got these sacks.'