Quote by Ellen DeGeneres (b. 1958)

• Procrastination isn't the problem, it's the solution. So procrastinate now, don't put it off.

• My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was sixty. She's ninety-five now, and we don't know where the hell she is.

• Stuffed deer heads on walls are bad enough, but it's worse when they are wearing dark glasses and have streamers in their antlers because then you know they were enjoying themselves at a party when they were shot.

• In the beginning there was nothing. God said, 'Let there be light!' And there was light. There was still nothing, but you could see it a whole lot better.

• I was coming home from kindergarten--well they told me it was kindergarten. I found out later I had been working in a factory for ten years. It's good for a kid to know how to make gloves.

• My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was sixty. She's ninety-seven now, and we don't know where the hell she is.